1
00:00:11,740 --> 00:00:13,509
Ah!

2
00:00:13,509 --> 00:00:15,844
Ow, God! Hi! Hey Tyson.

3
00:00:15,844 --> 00:00:17,279
You can't go to the newsstand anymore.

4
00:00:17,279 --> 00:00:18,380
I... I just wanted to go there

5
00:00:18,380 --> 00:00:19,548
and grab a couple snacks.

6
00:00:19,548 --> 00:00:20,716
You know, get away from Sue.

7
00:00:20,716 --> 00:00:21,850
We had kind of a rough night.

8
00:00:21,850 --> 00:00:23,819
Roofie's been arrested!

9
00:00:26,622 --> 00:00:27,823
Okay you can let go now, Tyson.

10
00:00:27,823 --> 00:00:28,924
I can't!

11
00:00:28,924 --> 00:00:29,925
My knuckles are caught

12
00:00:29,925 --> 00:00:31,426
in your braided bitch belt!

13
00:00:31,426 --> 00:00:32,594
Just let go! It's like a...

14
00:00:32,594 --> 00:00:33,729
it's like a raccoon trap.

15
00:00:33,729 --> 00:00:34,797
You gotta ease your fingers,

16
00:00:34,797 --> 00:00:35,831
ease the fingers open.

17
00:00:35,831 --> 00:00:37,699
There you go! See?

18
00:00:37,699 --> 00:00:38,767
Ah!

19
00:00:38,767 --> 00:00:42,767



20
00:00:47,876 --> 00:00:49,878
(screaming)

21
00:00:49,878 --> 00:00:53,878



22
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:13,535
You were such a careful

23
00:01:13,535 --> 00:01:14,736
and considerate drug dealer.

24
00:01:14,736 --> 00:01:15,838
Who took you down?

25
00:01:15,838 --> 00:01:17,339
Look, I never met the cop,

26
00:01:17,339 --> 00:01:18,941
but that big dick swings
to the name of Sid.

27
00:01:18,941 --> 00:01:20,342
Sid.

28
00:01:20,342 --> 00:01:22,044
Like Sid from the nursing home?

29
00:01:22,044 --> 00:01:23,979
I... I'm an undercover cop.

30
00:01:23,979 --> 00:01:26,448
I got intel for the precinct!

31
00:01:26,448 --> 00:01:28,784
That old fucker was like
one foot in the grave.

32
00:01:28,784 --> 00:01:30,752
His breath smelled like dead flowers!

33
00:01:30,752 --> 00:01:32,020
Look, we got a bigger problem, all right?

34
00:01:32,020 --> 00:01:33,722
All my product was confiscated.

35
00:01:33,722 --> 00:01:35,257
All of it.

36
00:01:35,257 --> 00:01:37,392
Even the special strain I was saving

37
00:01:37,392 --> 00:01:38,961
called Sue's finger.

38
00:01:38,961 --> 00:01:40,429
You named a special strain of weed

39
00:01:40,429 --> 00:01:41,530
after Sue's finger?

40
00:01:41,530 --> 00:01:42,931
You thoughtful devil, you.

41
00:01:42,931 --> 00:01:45,467
Listen, your dead girlfriend's finger

42
00:01:45,467 --> 00:01:47,903
is in a weed box in the evidence room!

43
00:01:47,903 --> 00:01:49,404
Okay well, lucky for us,

44
00:01:49,404 --> 00:01:51,340
I am a master improvoseur.

45
00:01:51,340 --> 00:01:53,775
- You're not.
- And a diplomat of disguise!

46
00:01:53,775 --> 00:01:55,010
Those two words don't even go together.

47
00:01:55,010 --> 00:01:56,945
- Read my lips.
- Through the phone?

48
00:01:56,945 --> 00:02:00,549
Yes. We are fine.

49
00:02:00,549 --> 00:02:02,351
I'ma fucking die in here.

50
00:02:02,351 --> 00:02:07,022



51
00:02:07,022 --> 00:02:09,791
(loudly clears throat)

52
00:02:09,791 --> 00:02:12,661
Officer Jeff... Jeffs... Jefferson...

53
00:02:12,661 --> 00:02:14,997
Jeff Jefferson reporting for duty.

54
00:02:14,997 --> 00:02:17,499
Preferably in the, uh, evidence room?

55
00:02:20,636 --> 00:02:22,938
(laughing)

56
00:02:22,938 --> 00:02:24,606
Who's the hilarious asshole

57
00:02:24,606 --> 00:02:26,275
who ordered a stripper
for Teddy's birthday?

58
00:02:26,275 --> 00:02:27,709
Oh... no. I'm... I'm not that.

59
00:02:27,709 --> 00:02:28,977
Oh shit!

60
00:02:28,977 --> 00:02:30,345
You're that fat dude from TV!

61
00:02:30,345 --> 00:02:31,747
Nope! I'm not that either.

62
00:02:31,747 --> 00:02:33,515
I'm not... I, I'm just an officer

63
00:02:33,515 --> 00:02:34,816
of the law here.

64
00:02:34,816 --> 00:02:36,451
I button my pants up one side at a time

65
00:02:36,451 --> 00:02:37,886
just like everybody else.

66
00:02:37,886 --> 00:02:39,321
Oh, you big time me?

67
00:02:39,321 --> 00:02:41,356
You know what? Fuck you.

68
00:02:41,356 --> 00:02:42,791
With all... with all your teeth,

69
00:02:42,791 --> 00:02:43,992
and all your fingers,

70
00:02:43,992 --> 00:02:45,527
and all your ears.

71
00:02:45,527 --> 00:02:47,763
Why do you not have those things?

72
00:02:47,763 --> 00:02:48,830
I'm gonna fuck the fame

73
00:02:48,830 --> 00:02:49,865
off your face.

74
00:02:49,865 --> 00:02:51,767
- Ahh!!
- Hey!

75
00:02:51,767 --> 00:02:54,536
No! No, no!

76
00:02:54,536 --> 00:02:56,939
(yelling continues)

77
00:02:56,939 --> 00:03:00,939



78
00:03:04,246 --> 00:03:05,914
Improvoseur.

79
00:03:05,914 --> 00:03:09,914



80
00:03:10,519 --> 00:03:11,653
Please be open, please be open,

81
00:03:11,653 --> 00:03:12,955
please be open.

82
00:03:12,955 --> 00:03:13,855
(lock rattles)

83
00:03:13,855 --> 00:03:15,757
Ah, fuck a duck!

84
00:03:15,757 --> 00:03:17,326
- Freeze!
- Oh, shit, I'm sorry.

85
00:03:17,326 --> 00:03:18,760
I would never actually fuck a duck. I mean,

86
00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:20,562
I can't even find the hole where the eggs

87
00:03:20,562 --> 00:03:21,897
come out... I mean, I can
find it, but I don't think

88
00:03:21,897 --> 00:03:23,498
you could even get a finger in there.

89
00:03:23,498 --> 00:03:24,666
Hands on your head, asshole!

90
00:03:24,666 --> 00:03:25,834
Okay look, look.

91
00:03:25,834 --> 00:03:27,069
You don't have to do this.

92
00:03:27,069 --> 00:03:28,370
This is just a big misunderstanding, okay?

93
00:03:28,370 --> 00:03:29,938
Haven't you ever made a mistake?

94
00:03:29,938 --> 00:03:31,606
As a matter of fact, I have.

95
00:03:31,606 --> 00:03:33,809
Oh!

96
00:03:33,809 --> 00:03:35,811
Oh, you're a ghost.

97
00:03:35,811 --> 00:03:37,512
Hey look, I can get in
a lot of trouble here.

98
00:03:37,512 --> 00:03:38,714
This is not the time or the place

99
00:03:38,714 --> 00:03:39,815
for a big, elaborate backstory.

100
00:03:39,815 --> 00:03:43,251
The year was 1989.

101
00:03:43,251 --> 00:03:44,553
I was hot on the trail

102
00:03:44,553 --> 00:03:46,288
of the most dangerous psychopath

103
00:03:46,288 --> 00:03:48,390
this city's ever seen.

104
00:03:48,390 --> 00:03:49,891
A serial killer?

105
00:03:49,891 --> 00:03:51,927
- A serial flasher.
- Oh.

106
00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,528
Needless to say, the guy left

107
00:03:53,528 --> 00:03:56,498
a bad taste in my mouth.

108
00:03:56,498 --> 00:03:57,566
And you guys never caught him?

109
00:03:57,566 --> 00:03:58,967
We thought we did.

110
00:03:58,967 --> 00:04:00,369
My partner Frank and I were working

111
00:04:00,369 --> 00:04:01,470
around the clock.

112
00:04:01,470 --> 00:04:02,704
After months of dead ends,

113
00:04:02,704 --> 00:04:05,040
we landed on the doorstep of a man

114
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:07,275
named Johnny Penis.

115
00:04:07,275 --> 00:04:09,277
('80s synthesizer music)

116
00:04:09,277 --> 00:04:10,545
Wait, wait. Months?

117
00:04:10,545 --> 00:04:11,880
I would think with a name like Penis

118
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,382
he would have been a suspect immediately.

119
00:04:13,382 --> 00:04:14,883
Don't interrupt a flashback, man!

120
00:04:14,883 --> 00:04:15,951
It's fucking rude!

121
00:04:15,951 --> 00:04:17,819
Yeah, I'm sorry, I hate that.

122
00:04:17,819 --> 00:04:21,456



123
00:04:21,456 --> 00:04:24,292
I kicked in the door on a hunch.

124
00:04:24,292 --> 00:04:25,694
- Freeze, asshole!
- Oh, woah!

125
00:04:25,694 --> 00:04:27,362
Take it easy, fellas.

126
00:04:27,362 --> 00:04:29,865
Don't move a muscle!

127
00:04:29,865 --> 00:04:31,266
I just gotta tighten my robe.

128
00:04:31,266 --> 00:04:32,667
I said fucking freeze!

129
00:04:32,667 --> 00:04:34,469
You... watch the language, fella!

130
00:04:34,469 --> 00:04:37,506
We got kids here!

131
00:04:37,506 --> 00:04:39,341
Keep those hands where we can see 'em.

132
00:04:39,341 --> 00:04:40,776
You got me just right
out of the shower, let...

133
00:04:40,776 --> 00:04:42,344
You think we're fucking around?

134
00:04:42,344 --> 00:04:44,012
You don't wanna see my penis, do you?

135
00:04:44,012 --> 00:04:46,281
Last warning motherfucker!

136
00:04:46,281 --> 00:04:47,783



137
00:04:47,783 --> 00:04:50,385
(gunfire)

138
00:04:52,954 --> 00:04:55,557



139
00:04:55,557 --> 00:04:58,794
(gunfire)

140
00:05:02,931 --> 00:05:05,333
He didn't leave us much of a choice.

141
00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:07,469
No...

142
00:05:07,469 --> 00:05:10,505
Frank and I got medals and promotions.

143
00:05:10,505 --> 00:05:12,307
We were heroes.

144
00:05:12,307 --> 00:05:15,510
And the city felt safe again.

145
00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:17,879
That is, until it started back up.

146
00:05:17,879 --> 00:05:18,914
The flashing?

147
00:05:18,914 --> 00:05:21,650
Not just the flashing.

148
00:05:21,650 --> 00:05:23,585
The photos.

149
00:05:23,585 --> 00:05:25,687
The sick bastard used to take Polaroids

150
00:05:25,687 --> 00:05:27,322
of his victims' reactions.

151
00:05:27,322 --> 00:05:29,057
- No!
- Yeah.

152
00:05:29,057 --> 00:05:30,826
Frank wrote it off as a copycock.

153
00:05:30,826 --> 00:05:34,826
But something about it rubbed me off wrong.

154
00:05:35,497 --> 00:05:37,566
Did we catch the right guy?

155
00:05:37,566 --> 00:05:39,568
Unfortunately, I died

156
00:05:39,568 --> 00:05:40,836
before I could ever be sure.

157
00:05:40,836 --> 00:05:42,771
Okay, I get it, I get it.

158
00:05:42,771 --> 00:05:44,372
Your obsession with this case is what

159
00:05:44,372 --> 00:05:46,308
ultimately led to your demise, right?

160
00:05:46,308 --> 00:05:47,409
No.

161
00:05:47,409 --> 00:05:48,743
Motorcycle accident.

162
00:05:48,743 --> 00:05:50,445



163
00:05:50,445 --> 00:05:51,913
(engine squeals to life)

164
00:05:51,913 --> 00:05:53,615



165
00:05:53,615 --> 00:05:55,984
(explosion)

166
00:05:57,853 --> 00:06:00,422
Precinct had the worst
fucking mechanic back then.

167
00:06:00,422 --> 00:06:03,458
Well, maybe I can help you solve this case?

168
00:06:03,458 --> 00:06:05,861
Forget it, asshole, I only work alone.

169
00:06:05,861 --> 00:06:07,929
What? What about Frank?

170
00:06:09,598 --> 00:06:10,999
Fine. I just said that
because I don't want...

171
00:06:10,999 --> 00:06:12,701
- ... to work with you.
- Hey, like it or not,

172
00:06:12,701 --> 00:06:14,469
you need a living person
to solve this case,

173
00:06:14,469 --> 00:06:15,804
and I'm the only one who can see you.

174
00:06:15,804 --> 00:06:17,305
All right? And I need a ghost to help me

175
00:06:17,305 --> 00:06:18,640
get my girlfriend's finger out of

176
00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:19,674
this evidence room, and you're the only one

177
00:06:19,674 --> 00:06:21,309
who can get me in there.

178
00:06:21,309 --> 00:06:22,277
So it looks like we might be

179
00:06:22,277 --> 00:06:24,880
stuck together, partner.

180
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:26,648
All right.

181
00:06:26,648 --> 00:06:28,850
- I got two rules, asshole.
- Hold, wait a minute.

182
00:06:28,850 --> 00:06:30,385
That's not, like, my new nickname, is it?

183
00:06:30,385 --> 00:06:31,887
First, don't call me partner.

184
00:06:31,887 --> 00:06:33,488
Okay, got it.

185
00:06:33,488 --> 00:06:35,590
And second, don't you dare embarrass me.

186
00:06:35,590 --> 00:06:37,025
I would never.

187
00:06:37,025 --> 00:06:39,294
Hey! What are you doing down here?

188
00:06:39,294 --> 00:06:41,630
I don't know. I'm lost and scared.

189
00:06:41,630 --> 00:06:42,831
Well, we're ready for you now.

190
00:06:42,831 --> 00:06:43,965
Okay.

191
00:06:43,965 --> 00:06:46,034
Give me a minute, partner.

192
00:06:46,034 --> 00:06:49,971



193
00:06:55,722 --> 00:06:57,724
Detective Frank Powell?

194
00:06:57,724 --> 00:07:00,493
It's Chief Powell. Who the hell are you?

195
00:07:00,493 --> 00:07:02,762
Uh, I am Officer
Pacalioglu at your service.

196
00:07:02,762 --> 00:07:04,197
Uh!

197
00:07:04,197 --> 00:07:05,432
Jesus Christ, you're the stripper cop.

198
00:07:05,432 --> 00:07:06,766
How the fuck did you get in here?

199
00:07:06,766 --> 00:07:08,568
No, I'm not a stripper cop.

200
00:07:08,568 --> 00:07:10,070
I'm a medium, and I'm here

201
00:07:10,070 --> 00:07:14,074
with the ghost of your ex-partner Max.

202
00:07:14,074 --> 00:07:15,141
Max?

203
00:07:15,141 --> 00:07:17,444
Yeah, he's right here.

204
00:07:21,081 --> 00:07:22,582
You got one minute.

205
00:07:22,582 --> 00:07:24,117
Okay, that's all we need.

206
00:07:24,117 --> 00:07:27,287
We want to bust an old case wide open.

207
00:07:27,287 --> 00:07:29,122
What case?

208
00:07:29,122 --> 00:07:30,423
The Polaroid flasher.

209
00:07:30,423 --> 00:07:32,592
The Polaroid flasher.

210
00:07:32,592 --> 00:07:34,561
Jesus Christ, Max!

211
00:07:34,561 --> 00:07:36,162
You just can't let that thing go, can you?

212
00:07:36,162 --> 00:07:37,330
We caught the guy!

213
00:07:37,330 --> 00:07:38,131
We didn't find one Polaroid

214
00:07:38,131 --> 00:07:39,566
on Johnny Penis.

215
00:07:39,566 --> 00:07:40,767
And remind him there's been new victims.

216
00:07:40,767 --> 00:07:41,801
Max wants me to remind you

217
00:07:41,801 --> 00:07:43,069
there's been new victims.

218
00:07:43,069 --> 00:07:44,804
No, there's been copycocks.

219
00:07:44,804 --> 00:07:46,272
- Yeah, but they...
- All right?

220
00:07:46,272 --> 00:07:48,074
None of these new victims could pick

221
00:07:48,074 --> 00:07:49,309
a penis out of the lineup.

222
00:07:49,309 --> 00:07:50,810
- None of them!
- Wait.

223
00:07:50,810 --> 00:07:52,045
You guys actually did that?

224
00:07:52,045 --> 00:07:52,712
I'm gonna have to ask you

225
00:07:52,712 --> 00:07:54,414
to leave, stripper cop.

226
00:07:54,414 --> 00:07:56,016
Hey, I'm just tryin' to help with Max, man.

227
00:07:56,016 --> 00:07:58,385
- You know, we're jamming!
- Max is dead.

228
00:07:58,385 --> 00:08:01,254
Okay? And this case is closed.

229
00:08:01,254 --> 00:08:03,223
Now you can take your booty cheeks

230
00:08:03,223 --> 00:08:06,359
and clap them together somewhere else.

231
00:08:06,359 --> 00:08:07,594
I'm sorry. I feel like I

232
00:08:07,594 --> 00:08:09,262
really let you down up there, Max.

233
00:08:09,262 --> 00:08:11,231
26th West 30th Street.

234
00:08:11,231 --> 00:08:13,366
What's that? A good s'mizza place?

235
00:08:13,366 --> 00:08:15,402
It's the address of the last victim.

236
00:08:15,402 --> 00:08:17,404
I saw it in the file
before Frank humiliated you

237
00:08:17,404 --> 00:08:19,639
with that booty clap comment.

238
00:08:19,639 --> 00:08:21,307
I say we go pay her a visit.

239
00:08:21,307 --> 00:08:22,809
Yeah!

240
00:08:22,809 --> 00:08:24,677
Hey! That's not how we roll.

241
00:08:26,146 --> 00:08:28,381
Holy shit. Sweet ride!

242
00:08:28,381 --> 00:08:29,516
Hop in, asshole!

243
00:08:29,516 --> 00:08:31,117
Yeah, can do!

244
00:08:31,117 --> 00:08:34,220



245
00:08:34,220 --> 00:08:35,688
All right, let's do this!

246
00:08:35,688 --> 00:08:37,024
(tires squealing)

247
00:08:37,168 --> 00:08:38,936



248
00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:40,538
I wish I could help you identify him,

249
00:08:40,538 --> 00:08:42,173
but he held the Polaroid camera

250
00:08:42,173 --> 00:08:44,842
directly in front of his face.

251
00:08:44,842 --> 00:08:47,311
He's a smart fucker, I'll give him that.

252
00:08:47,311 --> 00:08:49,513
Covers his face, flashes the damn camera

253
00:08:49,513 --> 00:08:51,248
right in his victim's eyes.

254
00:08:51,248 --> 00:08:53,317
Ma'am, I'm not interested in the face.

255
00:08:53,317 --> 00:08:55,986
Let's get into the meat of this, shall we?

256
00:08:55,986 --> 00:08:58,155
White?

257
00:08:58,155 --> 00:09:01,158
Black?

258
00:09:01,158 --> 00:09:02,793
Asian?

259
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:04,295
I'd say white?

260
00:09:04,295 --> 00:09:05,563
You'd say white?

261
00:09:05,563 --> 00:09:07,264
It had a healthy glow to it.

262
00:09:07,264 --> 00:09:08,866
I see, okay.

263
00:09:08,866 --> 00:09:10,534
- Circumsized?
- No.

264
00:09:10,534 --> 00:09:12,102
It was a hooded hell hound.

265
00:09:12,102 --> 00:09:13,404
Mhm. Any curve to it?

266
00:09:13,404 --> 00:09:14,872
A little to the left.

267
00:09:14,872 --> 00:09:15,873
Veins?

268
00:09:15,873 --> 00:09:16,874
A few, on the side.

269
00:09:16,874 --> 00:09:18,042
Pube pattern?

270
00:09:18,042 --> 00:09:19,276
Freshly groomed.

271
00:09:19,276 --> 00:09:20,444
Like it had seen a trimmer

272
00:09:20,444 --> 00:09:24,048
that very morning.

273
00:09:24,048 --> 00:09:25,049
How's this?

274
00:09:25,049 --> 00:09:26,116
Oh, God!

275
00:09:26,116 --> 00:09:28,118
Oh, God. That's it.

276
00:09:28,118 --> 00:09:30,120
I... I... couldn't get out of its way;

277
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,589
it flopped right at me!

278
00:09:31,589 --> 00:09:33,324
I need to know about the balls.

279
00:09:33,324 --> 00:09:34,391
She's had enough, man.

280
00:09:34,391 --> 00:09:36,393
Ask her about the balls!

281
00:09:36,393 --> 00:09:37,895
Ma'am, the ball placement?

282
00:09:37,895 --> 00:09:39,363
No, please, I can't take anymore.

283
00:09:39,363 --> 00:09:40,431
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- I need to know!

284
00:09:40,431 --> 00:09:41,932
Okay. Stay with me!

285
00:09:41,932 --> 00:09:43,400
Focus up and describe

286
00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:45,135
those dangly bastards to me.

287
00:09:45,135 --> 00:09:48,205
Oh, they were swinging.

288
00:09:48,205 --> 00:09:50,140
Ugh, I can still hear them slapping

289
00:09:50,140 --> 00:09:51,475
against his mid-thigh.

290
00:09:51,475 --> 00:09:53,244
- Mhm.
- All right?

291
00:09:53,244 --> 00:09:55,279
- Are you happy now?
- No!

292
00:09:55,279 --> 00:09:56,780
I didn't want you to cry!

293
00:09:56,780 --> 00:10:00,417
Aw, come... was that really necessary?

294
00:10:00,417 --> 00:10:01,952
- Mid-thigh.
- What?

295
00:10:01,952 --> 00:10:03,988
That testicular drooping is as consistent

296
00:10:03,988 --> 00:10:06,056
with a man in his mid-fifties.

297
00:10:06,056 --> 00:10:07,758
The exact age the Polaroid flasher

298
00:10:07,758 --> 00:10:09,460
would be if he were alive today.

299
00:10:09,460 --> 00:10:11,862
Holy shit.

300
00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:13,998
Are we hot on the trail of something?

301
00:10:13,998 --> 00:10:15,432
Unfortunately, we're fresh out of leads.

302
00:10:15,432 --> 00:10:16,934
Aw, fuck it.

303
00:10:16,934 --> 00:10:18,869
We've got nothing but droopy balls

304
00:10:18,869 --> 00:10:21,272
and a camera owned by
every family in the city.

305
00:10:21,272 --> 00:10:22,806
What, uh, the Polaroid?

306
00:10:22,806 --> 00:10:24,909
No, no, no, nobody uses
the Polaroid anymore.

307
00:10:24,909 --> 00:10:26,944
But he's still buying film. How?

308
00:10:26,944 --> 00:10:28,045
On the internet, probably?

309
00:10:28,045 --> 00:10:29,346
The what?

310
00:10:29,346 --> 00:10:31,882
Right, there was no internet back then!

311
00:10:31,882 --> 00:10:33,183
And a man in his fifties might

312
00:10:33,183 --> 00:10:35,352
wanna do things the old fashioned way.

313
00:10:35,352 --> 00:10:36,520
There's only one place in town I know

314
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,222
that still sells Polaroid film.

315
00:10:38,222 --> 00:10:40,157
Right next to my favorite s'mizza parlor.

316
00:10:40,157 --> 00:10:41,892
Take me there, asshole.

317
00:10:41,892 --> 00:10:43,994
I think I'm starting to like that nickname.

318
00:10:43,994 --> 00:10:48,365



319
00:10:48,365 --> 00:10:49,934
(loudly clears throat)

320
00:10:49,934 --> 00:10:53,103



321
00:10:53,103 --> 00:10:54,939
Vintage Polaroid 600 film.

322
00:10:54,939 --> 00:10:56,173
You carry it?

323
00:10:56,173 --> 00:10:57,508
It's not cheap.

324
00:10:57,508 --> 00:10:59,076
Sounds like our suspect has some cash

325
00:10:59,076 --> 00:11:01,378
to throw around these days.

326
00:11:01,378 --> 00:11:02,913
My partner and I are going to need the name

327
00:11:02,913 --> 00:11:04,081
and address of everybody who's bought

328
00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:05,449
that film in the past...

329
00:11:05,449 --> 00:11:07,017
- Ten years.
- Ten years.

330
00:11:07,017 --> 00:11:08,085
You ever hear of

331
00:11:08,085 --> 00:11:09,553
camera-customer confidentiality?

332
00:11:09,553 --> 00:11:10,554
Oh, shit, is that a thing?

333
00:11:10,554 --> 00:11:12,256
Is he making that up?

334
00:11:12,256 --> 00:11:14,158
Slam this motherfucker's
head against the counter!

335
00:11:14,158 --> 00:11:15,826
Yeah, what do I do? Just
grab him by the ears?

336
00:11:15,826 --> 00:11:17,761
- By the fucking neck?
- The moment's gone, now.

337
00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:18,862
But I'm like in the middle of doin' it!

338
00:11:18,862 --> 00:11:20,497
I'm calling the cops.

339
00:11:20,497 --> 00:11:21,799
No you're not, 'cause they're already here,

340
00:11:21,799 --> 00:11:22,900
butterface!

341
00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:24,335
All right. Take it easy.

342
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:25,502
I'll just run in the back

343
00:11:25,502 --> 00:11:27,871
and grab the books, right now.

344
00:11:27,871 --> 00:11:30,341
You get the books, and then I'll relax.

345
00:11:32,843 --> 00:11:35,312
So, uh, when do I get my gun, partner?

346
00:11:35,312 --> 00:11:36,981
Never. And you really need

347
00:11:36,981 --> 00:11:38,849
to stop referring to us as partners.

348
00:11:38,849 --> 00:11:40,484
This is a classic partner quarrel.

349
00:11:40,484 --> 00:11:41,986
We're strangers.

350
00:11:41,986 --> 00:11:44,088
We do this one job and we're done.

351
00:11:44,088 --> 00:11:45,522
Don't think I'm gonna sit here

352
00:11:45,522 --> 00:11:47,191
and open up to you

353
00:11:47,191 --> 00:11:49,193
about my lesbian ex-wife.

354
00:11:49,193 --> 00:11:51,996
That never crossed my mind.

355
00:11:51,996 --> 00:11:53,297
Bitch.

356
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:54,865
No, I thought we'd start small, you know?

357
00:11:54,865 --> 00:11:56,100
Like, what's your favorite kind of candy?

358
00:11:56,100 --> 00:11:57,368
Got you pegged as a Kit Kat guy.

359
00:11:57,368 --> 00:11:58,869
- Give me a break.
- Turkish delight?

360
00:11:58,869 --> 00:12:00,170
- You start...
- Watermelon nerds?

361
00:12:00,170 --> 00:12:01,372
You start talking about personal stuff

362
00:12:01,372 --> 00:12:03,240
and you're not focusing, all right?

363
00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:07,177
- You miss shit.
- What kinda shit?

364
00:12:07,177 --> 00:12:08,212
Oh, clerk!

365
00:12:08,212 --> 00:12:09,380
God!

366
00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:13,117
Ah, damn it!

367
00:12:13,117 --> 00:12:14,451
Oh, well.

368
00:12:14,451 --> 00:12:15,886
I'm sure we'll find another lead.

369
00:12:15,886 --> 00:12:16,987
Chase him!

370
00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:18,322
It seems pretty fruitless now,

371
00:12:18,322 --> 00:12:19,857
I mean, he's like halfway down the...

372
00:12:19,857 --> 00:12:23,260



373
00:12:23,260 --> 00:12:24,862
Oh, uh-uh.

374
00:12:24,862 --> 00:12:27,865



375
00:12:27,865 --> 00:12:28,999
Sorry for your loss!

376
00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:32,999



377
00:12:36,507 --> 00:12:37,474
You better start talking,

378
00:12:37,474 --> 00:12:39,443
or I start stompin'!

379
00:12:39,443 --> 00:12:40,511
Go ahead.

380
00:12:40,511 --> 00:12:41,945
This is a vintage store.

381
00:12:41,945 --> 00:12:43,781
This shit's all broken anyway.

382
00:12:43,781 --> 00:12:45,249
Do you have any camera bags?

383
00:12:45,249 --> 00:12:46,550
Oh, on the back wall.

384
00:12:46,550 --> 00:12:48,185
To the left.

385
00:12:49,186 --> 00:12:50,888
It's back there.

386
00:12:50,888 --> 00:12:51,955
Time to turn up the heat.

387
00:12:51,955 --> 00:12:53,323
Fuck yeah.

388
00:12:55,225 --> 00:12:56,960
Woah, okay, okay. I'll talk.

389
00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:59,163
Really? Just like that?

390
00:12:59,163 --> 00:13:00,297
Yes.

391
00:13:00,297 --> 00:13:01,398
I can't afford to be closed

392
00:13:01,398 --> 00:13:02,299
in the middle of the day.

393
00:13:02,299 --> 00:13:03,567
Are you fucking crazy?

394
00:13:03,567 --> 00:13:04,902
Yeah, let me think about that.

395
00:13:04,902 --> 00:13:06,370
Yes I'm fucking crazy!

396
00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:07,905
I'm fucking nuts.

397
00:13:07,905 --> 00:13:09,573
- We want some names.
- We want some names!

398
00:13:09,573 --> 00:13:11,341
Well, there's this one guy...

399
00:13:11,341 --> 00:13:13,010
There's this one guy!

400
00:13:13,010 --> 00:13:14,211
- There's this one guy...
- One guy!

401
00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,345
One guy who keeps buying

402
00:13:15,345 --> 00:13:17,381
a lot of Polaroid 600 stock.

403
00:13:17,381 --> 00:13:19,983
Oh yeah?

404
00:13:19,983 --> 00:13:23,320
Let me ask you something.

405
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:26,890
Dick look anything like this?

406
00:13:26,890 --> 00:13:28,358
Let me jog your memory.

407
00:13:28,358 --> 00:13:30,127
What's his dick look like, fuckface?

408
00:13:30,127 --> 00:13:32,329
I... I... I don't know.

409
00:13:32,329 --> 00:13:35,866
I just know his name is, uh, Barry.

410
00:13:35,866 --> 00:13:38,068
That's a good start.

411
00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:39,403
Weinberger...

412
00:13:39,403 --> 00:13:40,904
Oh, you're still going, that's great.

413
00:13:40,904 --> 00:13:42,906
... stein.

414
00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:44,475
Sorry, did you just say
Barry Weinbergerstein?

415
00:13:44,475 --> 00:13:46,443
- Yeah.
- You know him?

416
00:13:46,443 --> 00:13:49,813
Holy shit, yeah, I know him.

417
00:13:49,813 --> 00:13:51,115
He's the fucking president of...

418
00:13:51,115 --> 00:13:52,416
The president is a Jew?

419
00:13:52,416 --> 00:13:54,184
What? No. Worse.

420
00:13:54,184 --> 00:13:55,486
A woman?

421
00:13:55,486 --> 00:13:56,520
No, I didn't mean worse like that.

422
00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,155
I meant...

423
00:13:58,155 --> 00:13:59,556
This is bigger than any political scandal

424
00:13:59,556 --> 00:14:00,958
you could ever think of.

425
00:14:00,958 --> 00:14:02,159
This could shake up the entire

426
00:14:02,159 --> 00:14:03,927
reality entertainment industry.

427
00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:06,130
Barry Weinbergerstein

428
00:14:06,130 --> 00:14:07,865
is the President of Alt TV.

429
00:14:07,865 --> 00:14:11,135
The president of all TV?

430
00:14:11,135 --> 00:14:12,503
(stuttering)

431
00:14:12,503 --> 00:14:15,506
Would that raise the stakes for you?

432
00:14:15,506 --> 00:14:16,807
Fuck yeah.

433
00:14:16,807 --> 00:14:18,142
Then sure, yeah, that's him.

434
00:14:21,112 --> 00:14:23,114



435
00:14:23,114 --> 00:14:25,116
This goes all the way to the top...

436
00:14:25,116 --> 00:14:26,617
of reality TV.

437
00:14:26,617 --> 00:14:28,653
Who the fuck keeps letting stripper cop in?

438
00:14:28,653 --> 00:14:30,388
Listen to me, Frank. The Polaroid flasher

439
00:14:30,388 --> 00:14:31,689
is still out there.

440
00:14:31,689 --> 00:14:33,157
Max and I discovered his true identity.

441
00:14:33,157 --> 00:14:35,660
Look, let me stop you right there, okay?

442
00:14:35,660 --> 00:14:38,296
I need to make something
really clear to you.

443
00:14:38,296 --> 00:14:40,631
If I catch you playing
cop in my city again,

444
00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:42,700
I'm gonna have you arrested, locked up...

445
00:14:42,700 --> 00:14:44,302
Let me guess, you're
gonna throw away the key.

446
00:14:44,302 --> 00:14:45,603
No, no!

447
00:14:45,603 --> 00:14:47,171
I'm gonna shove it up your asshole!

448
00:14:47,171 --> 00:14:48,139
That's what I'm gonna do!

449
00:14:48,139 --> 00:14:49,707
Be a big mistake, pal.

450
00:14:49,707 --> 00:14:51,309
I could eventually poop that key out

451
00:14:51,309 --> 00:14:53,678
and free myself.

452
00:14:53,678 --> 00:14:55,346
Look, this is over, stripper cop.

453
00:14:55,346 --> 00:14:57,181
Okay? Case closed.

454
00:14:57,181 --> 00:14:59,117
Now I want you to clap
your ass on out of here.

455
00:14:59,117 --> 00:15:00,518
- Get to clappin'!
- All right, I'll go!

456
00:15:00,518 --> 00:15:03,221
But you should know
one thing before I do...

457
00:15:03,221 --> 00:15:05,690
Max is disappointed in you.

458
00:15:07,125 --> 00:15:08,593
I never said that.

459
00:15:08,593 --> 00:15:10,528
You didn't have to.

460
00:15:10,528 --> 00:15:14,528



461
00:15:16,167 --> 00:15:17,368
Max, I think this is where you and I

462
00:15:17,368 --> 00:15:18,569
part ways.

463
00:15:18,569 --> 00:15:20,071
- What?
- Yeah.

464
00:15:20,071 --> 00:15:21,706
But we're so close.

465
00:15:21,706 --> 00:15:23,541
Did you hear Frank up there?

466
00:15:23,541 --> 00:15:25,076
He's gonna throw me in jail.

467
00:15:25,076 --> 00:15:26,344
If that happens, I won't be able

468
00:15:26,344 --> 00:15:28,279
to get what I need out of jail.

469
00:15:28,279 --> 00:15:30,548
And I'll have a key jammed up my ass.

470
00:15:30,548 --> 00:15:32,049
That was not part of the plan, Max.

471
00:15:32,049 --> 00:15:33,117
I'm sorry.

472
00:15:33,117 --> 00:15:34,685
It's fine.

473
00:15:34,685 --> 00:15:36,254
I was a fucking fool for thinking

474
00:15:36,254 --> 00:15:38,423
you'd ever see this through.

475
00:15:38,423 --> 00:15:40,291
- Well...
- You're not a real cop.

476
00:15:40,291 --> 00:15:41,692
That's true. I'm really not.

477
00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:43,728
You're a stripper cop.

478
00:15:43,728 --> 00:15:47,064
Well, actually, I'm not that either, uhh...

479
00:15:47,064 --> 00:15:49,434
Is this what you were looking for?

480
00:15:49,434 --> 00:15:51,436
Oh my God! Sue's finger!

481
00:15:51,436 --> 00:15:53,471
- Oh!
- Yeah.

482
00:15:53,471 --> 00:15:55,606
Go finger fuck yourself.

483
00:15:55,606 --> 00:15:59,606



484
00:16:02,346 --> 00:16:03,548
Sue?

485
00:16:03,548 --> 00:16:07,548



486
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:50,294
Is this seat taken?

487
00:16:50,294 --> 00:16:53,231
Get out of my car, you walking abortion.

488
00:16:53,231 --> 00:16:54,966
All right, I deserve that.

489
00:16:54,966 --> 00:16:56,400
It's harsh, but I deserve it.

490
00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:57,969
Listen, I just want you to know,

491
00:16:57,969 --> 00:17:00,204
if you let me sit here,
I won't embarrass you,

492
00:17:00,204 --> 00:17:01,606
I will not call you partner,

493
00:17:01,606 --> 00:17:03,441
and I won't even ask you
any personal questions...

494
00:17:03,441 --> 00:17:05,243
nothing about what your favorite candy is.

495
00:17:05,243 --> 00:17:07,478
Nothing. I swear.

496
00:17:07,478 --> 00:17:08,746
Okay?

497
00:17:08,746 --> 00:17:11,215
I just wanna see this thing through.

498
00:17:11,215 --> 00:17:15,215



499
00:17:16,354 --> 00:17:17,455
Okay, asshole.

500
00:17:17,455 --> 00:17:19,223
All right.

501
00:17:19,223 --> 00:17:23,261
All right, let's get down to biz.

502
00:17:23,261 --> 00:17:24,595
Oh, there is some messed up shit

503
00:17:24,595 --> 00:17:26,531
going on up there, Barry Weinbergerstein.

504
00:17:26,531 --> 00:17:28,332
Calling all units! We just got a report.

505
00:17:28,332 --> 00:17:31,135
There's a flashing on Flushing Avenue.

506
00:17:31,135 --> 00:17:32,336
Could be any flasher.

507
00:17:32,336 --> 00:17:33,571
Suspect has a penis that curves

508
00:17:33,571 --> 00:17:35,706
slightly to the left.

509
00:17:35,706 --> 00:17:37,408
That's pretty common.

510
00:17:37,408 --> 00:17:38,743
Mine did.

511
00:17:38,743 --> 00:17:41,546
Suspect is moving south
with a Polaroid camera.

512
00:17:41,546 --> 00:17:42,647
Polaroid camera.

513
00:17:42,647 --> 00:17:44,048
Shit! That's our guy!

514
00:17:44,048 --> 00:17:45,049
Let's bust him!

515
00:17:45,049 --> 00:17:49,587



516
00:17:49,587 --> 00:17:51,355
(loud sniffing)

517
00:17:51,355 --> 00:17:55,355



518
00:17:58,229 --> 00:17:59,697
Damn it!

519
00:17:59,697 --> 00:18:02,066
Where'd I put that extra film?

520
00:18:02,066 --> 00:18:03,501
Oh yeah, that's right.

521
00:18:03,501 --> 00:18:07,501



522
00:18:09,073 --> 00:18:10,207
Cover me, partner!

523
00:18:10,207 --> 00:18:14,207



524
00:18:18,649 --> 00:18:20,051
Oh!

525
00:18:21,218 --> 00:18:22,486



526
00:18:22,486 --> 00:18:24,188
(groaning in pain)

527
00:18:24,188 --> 00:18:25,389
- You okay?
- Yeah.

528
00:18:25,389 --> 00:18:28,192
Yeah, yeah, I think so.

529
00:18:28,192 --> 00:18:29,360
Where are we?

530
00:18:29,360 --> 00:18:31,228
We found the flasher's den.

531
00:18:31,228 --> 00:18:33,130
Holy shit.

532
00:18:33,130 --> 00:18:35,633



533
00:18:35,633 --> 00:18:37,335
This one's dated yesterday.

534
00:18:37,335 --> 00:18:40,571
This must be his pube trimmer.

535
00:18:40,571 --> 00:18:41,572
It's still warm.

536
00:18:41,572 --> 00:18:42,506
He was just here.

537
00:18:42,506 --> 00:18:43,741
No.

538
00:18:43,741 --> 00:18:45,009
I'm still here.

539
00:18:45,009 --> 00:18:46,377
(camera shutter snaps)

540
00:18:46,377 --> 00:18:47,211
Woah!

541
00:18:47,211 --> 00:18:50,581



542
00:18:55,129 --> 00:18:56,831
How could you do this to me, Frank?

543
00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:59,534
Wait a second. You're the Polaroid flasher?

544
00:18:59,534 --> 00:19:01,202
Dude, seriously, you have the most

545
00:19:01,202 --> 00:19:03,938
racially ambiguous penis
I have ever sketched.

546
00:19:03,938 --> 00:19:05,306
On the count of three,

547
00:19:05,306 --> 00:19:06,908
I'm gonna slide you the pube trimmer.

548
00:19:06,908 --> 00:19:09,043
Don't hesitate, just jam it in his neck!

549
00:19:09,043 --> 00:19:12,280
I wouldn't do that if I were you.

550
00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:13,981
Why can he hear me?

551
00:19:13,981 --> 00:19:15,349
- I don't know.
- Shut up!

552
00:19:15,349 --> 00:19:16,918
Shut up. You know what?

553
00:19:16,918 --> 00:19:20,087
- I'll shut you up.
- Oh, boy.

554
00:19:20,087 --> 00:19:22,523
(grunts)

555
00:19:22,523 --> 00:19:24,425
Oh, not like that.

556
00:19:24,425 --> 00:19:26,327
What did... who the hell is that?

557
00:19:26,327 --> 00:19:28,095
That's Johnny Penis!

558
00:19:28,095 --> 00:19:29,831
That's Johnny Penis?

559
00:19:29,831 --> 00:19:31,232
Oh, he must not have gone into his light.

560
00:19:31,232 --> 00:19:32,900
Damn right, I didn't go into the light.

561
00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:34,368
You assholes shot me before I got

562
00:19:34,368 --> 00:19:36,204
the perfect reaction photo!

563
00:19:36,204 --> 00:19:37,939
And I wasn't going without it.

564
00:19:37,939 --> 00:19:40,341
Fortunately, I learned about possession.

565
00:19:40,341 --> 00:19:42,977
And after inhabiting a few dirty hobos,

566
00:19:42,977 --> 00:19:44,545
I found the perfect vessel

567
00:19:44,545 --> 00:19:46,380
to continue my crimes.

568
00:19:46,380 --> 00:19:48,249
A decorated cop.

569
00:19:48,249 --> 00:19:50,518
Who got blackout drunk every night.

570
00:19:50,518 --> 00:19:51,953
I'm taking you down

571
00:19:51,953 --> 00:19:54,021
once and for all, Johnny Penis.

572
00:19:54,021 --> 00:19:56,257
Looks like we finally
got our man, huh, partner?

573
00:19:56,257 --> 00:19:58,092
Yeah, I'm still not really
comfortable with that.

574
00:19:58,092 --> 00:19:59,861
That's okay, yeah, it was a little early.

575
00:19:59,861 --> 00:20:02,930
Hey, what... what's going on?

576
00:20:02,930 --> 00:20:04,365
Uh, it's a little hard to explain.

577
00:20:04,365 --> 00:20:06,033
You had Penis inside you.

578
00:20:06,033 --> 00:20:08,135
I had Penis inside me?

579
00:20:08,135 --> 00:20:09,470
That's it, stripper cop!

580
00:20:09,470 --> 00:20:11,539
- You're under arrest.
- Me? No! What?

581
00:20:11,539 --> 00:20:15,209



582
00:20:15,209 --> 00:20:18,312
Oh, shit.

583
00:20:18,312 --> 00:20:20,014
I'm walkin' outta here.

584
00:20:20,014 --> 00:20:21,282
Don't try and stop me.

585
00:20:21,282 --> 00:20:25,282



586
00:20:28,456 --> 00:20:31,893
Say cheese, asshole!

587
00:20:31,893 --> 00:20:33,160
Yeah!

588
00:20:34,362 --> 00:20:36,998
It's over, Johnny Penis.

589
00:20:36,998 --> 00:20:38,933
You've been clipped.

590
00:20:38,933 --> 00:20:42,803
- Nice!
- Oh my God.

591
00:20:42,803 --> 00:20:44,272
That face!

592
00:20:44,272 --> 00:20:46,007
Surprised.

593
00:20:46,007 --> 00:20:48,843
Disgusted.

594
00:20:48,843 --> 00:20:50,278
And yet intrigued.

595
00:20:50,278 --> 00:20:53,047
I wouldn't say intrigued...

596
00:20:53,047 --> 00:20:55,883
It's the perfect reaction photo.

597
00:20:55,883 --> 00:20:57,251
It's the... it's the perfect

598
00:20:57,251 --> 00:20:58,819
reaction photo!

599
00:20:58,819 --> 00:21:01,556



600
00:21:01,556 --> 00:21:04,158
(both breathing heavily)

601
00:21:04,158 --> 00:21:06,861



602
00:21:06,861 --> 00:21:08,296
- Hey, Pac.
- Yeah?

603
00:21:08,296 --> 00:21:11,399
Good and Plenty, that's my favorite candy.

604
00:21:11,399 --> 00:21:12,833
Really?

605
00:21:12,833 --> 00:21:15,002
Those are fucking gross.

606
00:21:15,002 --> 00:21:19,002



607
00:21:24,245 --> 00:21:26,047
Case closed.

608
00:21:27,415 --> 00:21:31,218
- What happened?
- There you go.

609
00:21:31,218 --> 00:21:34,522
You saved me from myself.

610
00:21:34,522 --> 00:21:35,790
I did.

611
00:21:35,790 --> 00:21:36,958
Good job, stripper cop.

612
00:21:36,958 --> 00:21:38,159
Thank you.

613
00:21:38,159 --> 00:21:41,395
Good job!

614
00:21:41,395 --> 00:21:42,964
I gotta stop drinking so much.

615
00:21:42,964 --> 00:21:43,998
Ha!

616
00:21:43,998 --> 00:21:45,266
I'll drink to that.

617
00:21:45,266 --> 00:21:46,901
You buyin'?

618
00:21:46,901 --> 00:21:48,769



619
00:21:49,870 --> 00:21:54,870
- synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

620
00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:59,470
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0